remains
I am distraught. I read revelation 3 and it feels like God speaking the words ” Strengthen what remains” into me.Hauntingly
I cannot escape its truth. At first the heart rises because it recognises
the Master’s voice, heard so long ago. faraway. Then the reality of truth meeting the asphalt
sets in, grips me
like a claw constricting my heart. You are dead.
almost but so what. The dead and the dying. Only there remains for me – a reputation
of being alive, a memory of deeds incomplete before a complete God
the Father and just a tiny sliver of green emerging , His finger
beneath the pile of rubble, it lingers
much like Nehemiah’s rubble. my spirit
alive , is still breathing – half alive half dead on the ground. dry bones. Come
close and feel
the warm moisturized air that exudes
from my passages. It is about to die . It is not about to live.
Strengthen what remains
even though it is half dead and dying and ugly and tattered. There is still life,
still life. and I cry at the diagnosis.
Still the road ahead I clamber. So little life and in my tired weariness, I dread
the tomorrows of trying
strengthen that which is dying.
I am a doctor giving CPR to my spirit who is fracturing, ebbing
away. powerless , misunderstood , grieving
like giving up. I feel like all these years of trying and striving
have become nought – no avail. God no
has not come nor has he seen the pain. I have stumbled in my service and pursuit of Him. I am imperfect. My deeds are incomplete. stumbling
A gargantuan litany amasses before me. Here am I again fallen and weak, part shell and part dead. hearing the trumpet
call Wake Up! Be alert Be watchful!
Strengthen, make firm , establish
It remains !..alive beautiful, of the Spirit, living,
Remember what you have received , Hold On,
- Repent
I dread these words. But would I rather …” Better is one day in your courts than a thousand
elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents
of the wicked. ” Remembering
I would rather hear the voice of my Lord (healing truth) than sweet words of the lying disease called satan
Speak Ruach as Samuel said, your servant is listening.